With the novel in her hand, Maomao headed to Jinshi, who was sitting on the chair with a smile on his face, and took a seat on his lap after a few seconds of hesitation (yes, she had gotten quite used to having him very close, but it still wasn't that easy for her to do such things - especially while being watched by someone else).

He immediately wrapped his arms around her and pulled her a bit closer still, clasping his hands over her belly to hold her in place.

His hands were still pretty chilly, but at least not as ice-cold as they had been a few days ago. As if it had become a reflex, the apothecary promptly started rubbing them a bit with one of her own, in addition to the warmth her belly provided to his palms.

A slight surprise appeared on Jinshi's face as he sat there, watching her. But then it got replaced by an even bigger smile, and he briefly raised one of his hands and gave one of the young woman 's cheeks a loving caress with his thumb instead of expressing his gratitude with words. After that, he got back to squeezing her with both arms.

And when Suiren had finished her preparations a bit later and had started to wash her lord's hair, always careful to not touch his wound, Maomao finally opened the book and started to read him the first page.

After the first few sentences, she already had to pull herself together to avoid grimacing and to keep her voice under control. Such an exaggerated, embarrassing, cheesy nonsense! Just what the hell was so great about it that almost all the women of the inner palace were praising it so much and that it had even awakened the desire to learn how to read and write in a few of the maidservants? Maomao could barely endure that text! If Jinshi had dared to speak to her like the male protagonist in the book did to the female one, she would have shuddered and probably kicked him, even forgetting that he was a noble for a second! Well, probably not the current Jinshi, but the old one for sure...

Maomao didn't really care for other people 's tastes, but those things crossed her mind nonetheless.

If she had been alone, she would have flung that book into some corner and gone to do something more useful, like grinding medicinal herbs in her mortar, for example. She cast a furtive glance up to check Jinshi's reaction. He was still smiling, and his cheeks were a bit flushed. Oh, so he seemed to like it after all, huh? Well, looked like she had no other choice than to keep reading then.

"I admit, it does surprise me a bit that such stories seem to be to his liking,"

Maomao thought and frowned a little. But then she relaxed again. Oh, whatever, if they were, then they were. It didn't matter to her. Who was she to judge him?

For some time, her voice was the only sound in that silent chamber, if one didn't count Jinshi's occasional giggles whenever she reached the most dramatic parts of the hero's monologues.

"Hah, then he does find them as cringy as I do, eh?"

And after another one of such speeches, Maomao finally couldn't take it anymore. She had been holding herself back way too long already.

"You wonder what you can find there, buried under the flowers? Horse manure! Horse manure, that's what you find! Geez!" she muttered, annoyed. It was the same part of the text that Xiaolan had once quoted to her, as she remembered now.

As soon as she had realized, however, that she had spoken those words out loud, she quickly slapped her hand over her mouth, startled. But it was too late: the other two had definitely heard her and were now looking at her with big, widened eyes.

"Xiaomao!" Suiren scolded her with a light amusement in her tone.

"My apologies..."

Jinshi, on the other hand, was so red as if he was about to explode at any moment. His ribcage was shaking.

Until he couldn't hold it back anymore and burst out laughing. He was laughing so hard that he had tears in his eyes and could hardly breathe. Maomao had to cling to his clothes to not slide from his lap.

"Haha... Maomao... you... you should... write your own version of this book...that would be... hahaha... so hilarious..." He playfully tapped her nose with his index finger.

"Was that really so funny?"

Maomao thought, a bit confused. She had merely voiced a little critique, nothing more.

Suiren interrupted the washing for a moment and stroked his still trembling shoulders, waiting for him to calm down from his laughter. In any other situation, she would have probably reprimanded him for it, and Maomao also would have surely gotten irritated as well. But since it was the very first time since the accident that he was laughing so heartily, neither of them felt any desire to scold him.

"Haha... sorry, you two..." he eventually managed to apologize with some effort and wiped the laughing tears from his face, while a few little streams of soapy water flowed down his hair and his temples.

"It's alright, sir," Maomao muttered.

"Please make more such comments as you read, yes?" Jinshi asked her with a grin that made him look like a mischievous little boy.

"Don't listen to the young master, Xiaomao, otherwise I will never finish washing his hair!"

Maomao took a deep breath and just continued reading, without giving them an answer.

While the chief lady-in-waiting's hands were cautiously rinsing the foam out of the young man's long hair, the room was getting filled up with the apothecary's slightly monotone voice once again. Without even realizing it, Maomao had calmly leaned against his chest while reading, as though it had already become a habit to her. Well, it indeed kinda had, to be honest.

But before turning the page at some moment, she suddenly froze. Something was... odd. Several minutes had passed without her hearing a giggle or a single word from Jinshi.

His breathing was deep and calm... a certain suspicion arose in her mind, and she looked up into his face.

She had been right. Well, after all, it wasn't the first time that something like that was happening. Or more precisely: not the first time during the last few days.

"He has fallen asleep..." she commented quietly and closed the book. Not sounding surprised at all.

Having heard her, Suiren stopped her task of carefully pressing the now clear water out of Jinshi's hair into the tub and took a glance at his face as well.

"Oh, indeed. And I have already been wondering why he has gotten so quiet." So she had noticed it too. "Well, but it is already evening, after all."

Neither of the two women mentioned the fact that Jinshi had actually already taken a nap in the morning and afternoon of that same day.

"Somehow I already had an inkling that something like that might happen..."

Maomao thought.

***

Suiren and Maomao let out a tired sigh at the same time. They were always doing their best to maintain a rather positive environment around Jinshi to spare him unnecessary worries that could slow down his recovery process, but since he was sleeping for now, they could allow themselves to show a bit of their endless concern to the outside.

For even though he was indeed doing better than three days ago, his memory showed no hint whatsoever of wanting to return to him, no matter how much time they spent with him. Not to mention that he still didn't recognize even a single room in his own residence. The only progress (if you could describe it as such) was maybe that he had at least managed to memorize his sleeping chamber and the way to the bathroom.

And Maomao knew that the longer an amnesia lasted, the slimmer became the chances to regain one's memory at all... An unpleasant feeling that they were running out of time was eating at her day after day... and yet she couldn't rush things, but had to be patient with Jinshi and take it slowly. Because otherwise, it would do more harm than good and make everything even worse.

The apothecary clenched her teeth. She couldn't overwhelm Jinshi, for that might cause more panic attacks and also severe headaches and nightmares. But on the other side, she knew that she couldn't go easy on him forever... one day, Jinshi simply HAD to face his past in order to get it back. There was no other way.

A past that Maomao herself barely knew nothing about (since she had mostly refused to listen when he had wanted to tell him the truth about himself). But judging by what she did know, she assumed that it would probably be a rather unpleasant and painful process for him. And since it was her who had brought all that suffering over him in the first place, she would, of course, stay by his side and guide him through it. The best she possibly could.

Maomao put the book on her lap and pressed her lips together. As it seemed... that meant that she had no other choice than to eventually face Jinshi's past as well, huh? Although she wasn't sure whether she was really ready for it... or more precisely: whether she would ever be ready for it at all... But she had to. No other way for her, either.

She sighed again. Whatever. Tormenting herself like that wouldn't change anything anyway. She would just continue monitoring Jinshi's health for now and gradually start showing him around the rooms in his residence during the next days, hoping that it would be of use. Explain everything to him with all the patience she possessed and keep being that supporting pillar he was taking her for. Even though she still considered herself quite useless, not good enough to help him for real.

As if on cue, she started to feel Jinshi's chin on her head. His own head had tilted forward in his sleep.

But his grip around her stomach remained firm.

Suiren, who had dried the young lord's hair with the towel in the meantime, placed the latter back on his shoulders and stepped to the side.

She and the apothecary exchanged gazes.

"He sure does sleep a lot, doesn't he?" the chief lady-in-waiting finally broke the silence with worry in her voice.

"Yes." That was everything Maomao could say. She had informed Suiren that Jinshi had trouble sleeping at night from time to time, but omitted the details. Why? Well, because she just couldn't bring herself to tell the old lady and also Gaoshun that Jinshi was crying every night.

"Poor boy..."

Suiren lovingly stroked his still damp hair. It was a gesture of deep affection that Maomao had never witnessed from her before, but she could imagine very well that the older woman had probably done such things in his childhood as well. She was more than just a servant to him, and he was more than just her master to her, that much was evident.

"He looked so happy when you agreed to read the book to him. That was why I offered to wash his hair in your place."

"I understand..." Yes, Maomao was indeed understanding it very well. The young man was currently going through so much that one just couldn't help allowing him to enjoy every tiny piece of happiness he could get. Who could understand it better than her, who felt his body tremble and wiped his tears every night?

For the umpteenth time, the bitter thought came to her mind that he hadn't deserved any of this.

Suiren headed towards one of the cupboards and took out a blanket which she placed on Jinshi's shoulders instead of the towel and wrapped it around him, covering Maomao up as well. For she had been told as well that he was often feeling cold in the evenings and nights, despite the warm summer temperatures.

Maomao could still remember the shock on Suiren's face when the chief lady-in-waiting had touched one of Jinshi's hands for the first time after the accident to help him get up from the bed and realized just how ice-cold it was. And the worst part of it was that the apothecary hadn't been able to reassure her that it was nothing bad and didn't mean anything, because she didn't know herself whether that was the case.

"You know, Xiaomao, while I was leading him through the hallways, preparing the bath for him and helping him with his clothes, the young master was constantly talking about you. Only you."

Maomao didn't say anything. It was nothing new to her to know how attached he was to her ever since he had lost his memory.

"Well, I guess some things never change."

Now, Maomao looked up to her, baffled.

"Huh?"

Had her ears deceived her just now?

Suiren, however, just gave her a melancholic smile.

"Please get Master Jinshi to bed once he wakes up, Xiaomao."

"Yes, ma'am..."

Without another word, Suiren lit a few candles in the room, put the wet towel over her own shoulder, picked up the tub with the soapy water and left, leaving the still a bit confused Maomao alone with the sleeping Jinshi.

***

After the door had closed behind Suiren, Maomao blinked a few times, shoved the words she had just heard into some empty corner of her mind, and raised her hand, carefully touching Jinshi's cheek with her index finger. He was still sound asleep and didn't react to it. His neck muscles had completely relaxed in his sleep, making his chin press heavily onto her head. If she hadn't been sitting on his lap, the young lord might very well have lost his balance and fallen from the chair.

The apothecary started to think about what to do now. She briefly considered waking him up, after all she had no clue how long that slumber of his would last (his daytime naps could sometimes occupy several hours), but at the same time... she realized that she really didn't want to. Since the night would already arrive soon, the time so terribly hated by her and so feared by him. The time when he was barely able to get proper rest.

Maomao turned her head towards the window and watched with a frown how the sun was slowly setting and bathing the surroundings in an orange and almost blood-red light. How was the new night going to be? A more or less calm one or as horrible as the first one after the accident? No one knew. She shuddered at the mere thought that in just a few hours, Jinshi might cling to her once more, shaking like a leaf and shedding tears, terrified and in pain.

The apothecary unconsciously placed her hand on top of one of his that were still on her belly and leaned against his chest once again, with an expression that was a bit difficult to describe. It was decided: she would let him sleep for now and then see.

She yawned, beginning to feel her own fatigue. Hm, how odd, it wasn't as if she had done that much the entire day. She didn't even have to do any household chores for the time being. Well, maybe taking care of the amnesic Jinshi was more tiring than she thought and draining her energy. Even with Suiren's help.

After a while, her eyelids started getting a bit heavy. Perhaps she should use the time and sleep a bit as well...

Yet instead, her thoughts started wandering off while she felt his regular heartbeat close to her once more.

For example, she just couldn't avoid thinking again about how Jinshi was sleeping a lot more than in the past, even if one didn 't count the restless nights. And getting tired way faster, sometimes so fast that he just fell asleep without warning. Just like now. It still worried her a lot. Having gotten her stuff, she considered preparing him a remedy to restore his energy. But would that really help him?

"At least, he doesn't overwork himself anymore,"

she thought.

"And for someone, who has sustained such a head injury that made him even lose his memory, he's doing surprisingly well, isn't he? I'm sure he'll soon return to his former self."

Well, our Maomao was no optimist by any means, but in such a case, even she felt the need to look for positive aspects.

"Maomao..." she heard him mutter in his sleep not for the first and surely not for the last time and caught herself remembering how he used to call her mostly "apothecary" or "the girl" or just "you" in the past. So much had changed in a mere few days...

Oh, if only she could turn back time and make that accident never happen... The apothecary bit her lip, cursing herself for her own stupidity once again. If she had just ignored those damn birds, then nothing of this would have happened...

"I am so sorry, Master Jinshi," she said quietly and gently patted his arm. One day, when all that would finally be over, she would give him a proper apology and let him decide whether he really wanted to forgive her. If not, she would understand it... for even she still hadn't forgiven herself.

And as though Jinshi had sensed her thoughts and feelings in his sleep and wanted to comfort her, he hugged her a bit closer and murmured her name once more.

The odd feeling that had been lingering inside her during the last few days made itself felt again: the feeling that the new Jinshi was almost like a stranger to her, but at the same time as familiar as never before... so incredibly familiar, yet still so different. It was really confusing, to be honest.

For example, she had never thought that Jinshi could become even more clingy than he had already been. Oh, she couldn 't have been more wrong.

The image of a cheeping little duckling waddling after its mother emerged before her inner eye and made her sigh.

Every time she was with him, it was as if his hands had developed a life on their own and placed themselves on her shoulders or her head or grabbed her hands without him being able to control it. And apart from that, he was constantly hugging her, wanting to have her as close as possible. In fact, Maomao was squeezed so often that she now kinda felt like some sort of stuffed toy. More often in one single day than in her entire life before.

And to her own huge surprise... after all that had happened, she didn't really mind. But it was still astounding.

However, despite everything, it did annoy her from time to time, of course, for example, when he was hugging her so tightly that she could barely move, but she never complained. Only squirmed a bit when it really became too much. Then he always apologized and slackened his grip a little, but didn't let go unless she explicitly asked him to with words.

But what did indeed bother her greatly was his mind-blowing honesty and straightforwardness. Sometimes it was still very hard for her to deal with it.

Gone were the vague hints and insinuations. Now, Jinshi said exactly what he thought. Always. And in the case that he didn't want to pronounce something out loud after all, he stayed silent and merely looked at her. He never lied, she could sense it.

This led to him saying the most incredible things from time to time. So incredible that it rendered Maomao speechless.

"You are my light!" he had told her during the first night. And although she still didn't quite comprehend what that exactly meant, she always felt a weird tingling in her stomach whenever she recalled those words. A light one, but still very much noticeable.

It really wasn't easy with him. Even though she had wished in the past every now and then for him to drop his annoying sparkle and false honeyed smile and to behave more naturally.

"One should really be careful with their wishes", she muttered with furrowed brows. "Because they can come true..."

***

"Mmh?"

Approximately half an hour later, as Maomao was about to nod off for real, Jinshi started to stir and awoke with a big yawn, raising his head.

Blinking sleepily, he slowly returned to his senses and widened his eyes a bit when he realized that he was still sitting on the chair and feeling Maomao's pleasant weight on his lap. They were both wrapped into a blanket, and the young woman was looking up into his face. She didn't look angry or annoyed, however didn't say a word either.

Jinshi gave her an apologetic smile.

"I fell asleep, didn't I? Sorry..."

He really hadn't done it on purpose.

"Don't worry about it, sir," Maomao finally spoke and peeled the blanket from her body to stand up. "You're tired. Come, let's get you to bed."

She put the book on the table and briefly examined Jinshi's injury before wrapping the bandages around his head once again. Then she ran her hand over his hair in order to check if it was perhaps still a bit humid and finally grabbed his hand to make him get up from the chair.

All that time, a little smile never left Jinshi's face, showing all too clearly how comfortable he felt when she was with him.