Dazai 's thin fingers tugged on the edges of his cloak until Ron shot him a dirty look.

'...What? '

'Quit fidgeting! You 're going to tear a hole in that and we haven 't even made it in the school yet, you know. '

'You don 't think the cloaks are weird? ' Dazai huffed, tucking his bandaged arms behind his back with a childish sound. 'What are they adding to the learning experience? '

'It 's a school uniform. '

'It 's not

practical. '

And really, it 's

not.

Ever since he put the damn thing on, Dazai had been imagining all the different ways wearing a cloak was more of a hazard than anything else. For instance: what if he 's running away from someone? It would be too easy for them to grab at his cloak and drag him back! When he tried explaining this to Ron, however, his no-good subordinate-in-training had only replied with:

'Why are you planning to be chased? Just calm down, mate. '

It 's hard to find a good subordinate these days.

Ron rolled his eyes, all but pushing Dazai off the train. It was dark when they un-boarded, and Dazai silently mourned how much time he wasted talking to his classmates instead of gathering information. Still, when he hopped off the train a step ahead of Ron, Dazai couldn 't help but feel a tickle of excitement shoot up his spine.

It 's a strange feeling and not one he 'd ever want to voice aloud: Dazai doesn 't really get out much. For maybe the first time in forever, his bedroom door is unlocked and no one is watching his every move. Mori wants him here for a reason, of course 'but that old doctor isn 't here

now,

so there 's nothing wrong with enjoying this freedom a bit, right?

It 's not like anyone back home has to know that for maybe the first time in forever Dazai is feeling a

positive

emotion.

'

Woah! '

Dazai blinked back to attention, immediately tracking Ron 's awed voice to the hulking figure before them. The man stood more than twice Dazai 's height and three times as wide.

' 'Right then! ' The man boomed, startling some of the students around them, 'First years, this way please! '

Feeling rather pleased with himself for not flinching at the shout, Dazai barely noticed Ron shoot him an eager grin. Ron immediately trailed after the large fellow who had called for them like a dog to its master. With a raised brow, Dazai followed his subordinate lamely.

'This way to the boats 'follow me! '

'Boats? ' Dazai half-whispered to Ron.

The red-head shrugged, bounding along the path. 'We take boats across the lake to school, 's what I hear. ' After a quick look to Dazai, he added, 'Just the first years, though. My brother said after that we take horseless carriages over. '

As he spoke, Ron seamlessly guided he and Dazai into a rickety old boat. Dazai regarded the thing critically before shrugging and taking his seat. If it broke apart and they drowned... well, that wasn 't really a bad thing, right? Anyway, a quick glace to that large, bearded fellow proved the boats could handle a little weight. Dazai was almost disappointed to realize they

wouldn 't

be drowning this afternoon.

Wishful thinking.

He didn 't voice this thought aloud, however. Mori had warned him against being too obvious about his willingness to die, and although Dazai couldn 't care less about what that man had to say, he did see the merit in hanging around a bit longer. At the very least, he wanted to enjoy just one day without some mafioso breathing down his neck.

An orange-looking lantern laid out on the boat and Dazai mindlessly took it and held it over their heads. It wavered only slightly when two complete strangers boarded the boat behind them. Actually 'not strangers. The busy-haired girl from earlier was there! Their eyes met, shining in the swing of his lantern.

'Oh! You don 't

mind

if we sit here, do you? This is Neville Longbottom. I told you about him earlier. '

A quiet look passed between him and Ron, and Dazai got the impression the red-head didn 't appreciate Hermione's appearance. Dazai waved him off with a bandaged hand.

'Fellow with the lost toad, yeah? ' He hummed.

'Y-you 've seen Trevor?! '

'No, no. I was just thinking... is that a good pet? I bet it 's not as annoying as an owl. '

Neville stared at him, wide-eyed. Without warning, Ron elbowed him in the side, earning him a pout. Dazai put a hand on his side, whining, 'What was that for?! '

'Never mind that 'look! '

Dazai stared out over the water as the towering castle came into view. Hogwarts was a castle! Okay... that was kind of cool. Oppressive towers and peaks made the horizon, lit only by a thousand open windows. This sort of place was nothing like the cityscape of Yokohama! It was a strange, rustic place, and Dazai felt like he was sailing into the distant past 'a place of kings and queens. Still, Dazai was nothing if not an expert at schooling his expression, and for some reason gaping open-mouthed (like the rest of these brats) seemed like a concession. So Dazai kept his face carefully blank, sparing only the briefest looks of curiosity at such a magical sight.

Suddenly, Dazai felt the base of his skull buzz with energy. Was

No Longer Human

activating? He didn 't think anyone was using an ability on him... but this had happened at

Diagon

Alley too, hadn 't it? Something about the air itself was alive with the same power as an ability.

Magic?

Maybe this Hogwarts trip

would

be interesting, even with

Mori 's stupid,

secret plan at play.

Dazai breathed out a silent sigh, feeling the beginnings of a headache come on. He was almost relieved when they finally docked on the other side of the lake, if only just because seeing the other students so awed by Hogwarts was distantly annoying.

Tossing the lantern aside, Dazai readjusted quickly to having solid earth below him once again. Beside him, Ron, Hermione, and Neville stumbled a bit at the difference. Ron shot him a not-so subvert glare when Dazai offered nothing more than a chuckle as help.

'Off you go, then. ' Their guide waved two large hands toward what Dazai assumed to be the school entrance. 'Head up the stairs and Professor McGonagall will see you to the Great Hall for sorting. '

His boat-mates shared eager looks and hurried after the crowd. Dazai ambled after them lazily, propping his arms up behind his head and offering a passive look. A few steps behind them, Dazai took his time up the stairs, mutely wondering over the ornate stairway. Abruptly, the trio he was following came to a stop. Dazai glared at the backs of their heads when he stumbled a bit. That 's what he gets for letting his mind wander! At least none of these other punks bumped into him.

Blinking around Ron 's back, Dazai finally understood why they had stopped. An older-looking woman stood at the top of the stairs (McGonagall, his mind supplied helpfully). She wore a long cloak and a pointed hat that Dazai felt was a bit excessive, and between her crossed hands was a long, pointed wand.

'Welcome to Hogwarts. ' The professor called in a voice cracked with age and wear, 'Now, in a few moments you will pass through these doors and join your classmates. But before you can take your seats, you must be sorted into your houses. '

Ron looked to his side as if to say something, but instead found himself looking at the banister. He offered a startled look to the rail before sighing and stepping half-a-pace to the right. 'Dazai! ' He whisper-yelled, 'Why are you back there? '

Raising a brow, Dazai took his place beside Ron. 'I 'm following. '

'Wh ' '

A glare from McGonagall stole the protestation from Ron 's mouth. A few nervous chuckles filled the air around them at the silent scolding, and Dazai watched in vague amusement as the red-head withdrew into himself slightly.

'They are Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, ' her voice took on a dangerous edge, 'and Slytherin. '

The houses 'Dazai had done the barest amounts of research on them. He didn 't have a mind for arbitrary divisions; however, he got the impression house loyalties were

very

important to some of these other brats (if the chattering behind him was any indication). At the end of the day, Dazai 's loyalty could never lie with any of these houses 'or even Hogwarts for that matter. But none of these kids had to know he was only loyal to the mafia. Besides, he thought clarifying that was probably more trouble than it was worth.

'Now while you 're here, your house will be like your family. '

Ugh

, he hoped not.

After that, Dazai stopped paying attention. Instructions were

boring.

It was just schooling, anyhow, so Dazai didn 't anticipate being too out of his depth. Instead, he let his mind wander.

That tickling feeling in his brain hadn 't settled 'if anything, it had gotten more noticeable. He was sure of it: magic and abilities must be fundamentally the same concepts.

No Longer Human

was working itself too hard trying to nullify all of the potent energy in the room with the same force it would if he were touching an ability user. Honestly, it was all a bit tiring. Unfortunately, Dazai was nearly convinced that magic was some sort of non-localized ability. He 'd probably just have to get used to it. All the more evidence towards Dazai 's theory that he could not, in fact, utilize magic. Stupid Mori.

Dazai was distantly aware of that Longbottom kid finding his toad. Much to Dazai 's displeasure, the annoying little thing was making an obnoxious series of squeaking croaks. So much for a quiet pet. There 's no such thing as a good pet, probably. They 're all horrible little things and wizards should learn how to use a cell phone '

'Oi! We 're going in! '

Dazai turned a lazy glare to Ron, who elbowed him sharply in the side. 'I 'm going to bruise if you keep that up. If you 're going to hit me, at least be trying to kill me. '

Ron rolled his eyes, taking a hold of Dazai 's sleeve and tugging him up the final stair and through two large, open doors. 'We 're about to be sorted! Aren 't you excited? I 've got to be in Gryffindor, 'y 'know. Where do you 'reckon 'you 'll be? '

'Hm? Depends, which one is your least favorite? '

'Slytherin. ' The boy responded seriously, drawing a dull look from Dazai. 'No good snakes. They 're all Death Eaters. Oh 'you're a muggle born. Death Eaters are ' '

'Shh! ' someone hushed.

Dazai felt his mouth clamp shut at the whispered command. It was probably for the best, anyway, considering Ron was about to explain a terrorist organization to him on the way to the Great Hall.

Once the Great Hall came into view, even Dazai couldn 't pretend he wasn 't a little excited. Candles floated in the air, held aloft by nothing by what must have been magic. Above them, the ceiling wasn 't a ceiling at all 'instead, it was a clouded night sky. Dazai almost made to ask why he couldn 't feel a breeze if the roof was open, but on closer inspection could faintly see the beams and bars of a peaked ceiling. Was it a spell? What a useless thing to magic up! Although in the end, Dazai could recognize the view as somewhat impressive.

McGonagall lead her group to a complete stop at the front of the massive room just before... a hat? Dazai briefly let himself inspect the beat-up old hat before passing his eyes over the bigger threat. Up against the far wall was a long, horizontal table packed tightly with adults. Dazai picked Dumbledore and Snape out amongst the fifteen-or-so other people up there, and deduced those must be other professors and staff. Oh! That guy from the Leaky

Cauldron

with the

turban

was here too 'small world. Seeing them all lined up... Dazai squared his shoulders and felt his hands go a bit cold.

He didn 't like the idea they were watching him.

Clearly

they were more experienced in magic than him. That made them dangerous 'a threat. That buzzing feeling in his skull persisted, but now it was screaming

get out get out 'getout 'getoutgetoutgetout!

Dazai stuck his heels in the floor and bit his cheek.

Ron elbowed him in the side again, but his brows were drawn together tightly in an expression Dazai didn 't bother to identify. His side stinging, Dazai suddenly found his head clearing a bit. He shouldn 't be so afraid 'Dazai didn 't

do

afraid. Still, he couldn 't deny that

odd

sort of dread at being surrounded by people '

adults '

who could easily overpower him. He 'd blame Mori for it, since the doctor forced him to come to this stupid school in the first place.

From the other side of that long table, Dumbledore rose to his feet. Dazai found himself similarly rising to attention.

'I have a few

start

of term notices I wish to announce. ' He paused, 'The first years please note that the Dark Forest is strictly forbidden to all students. Also, our caretaker, Mr. Filch would like to remind you that the third-floor corridor on the right-hand side is out of bounds to everyone who does not wish to die a most painful death. '

At the word 'death ' Dazai perked up, eyes lighting with a mix of interest and eagerness. He bounced on his heels, already trying to imaging what sorts of things might be hidden on the third floor. Although he wasn 't too keen on a

painful

death per say, Dazai couldn 't fight the trill of excitement at the notion of dying on campus.

Beside him, Ron must have picked up on Dazai 's barely restrained longing for death, because the

Weasely

shot him an indescribable look that he was choosing to translate as support.

'Thank you. ' The headmaster finished simply. Feeling a bit anti-climactic, Dazai rolled on the balls of his heels as if to shake off some loose energy.

'Now, ' McGonagall spoke once Dumbledore was seated once more, 'when I call your name, you will come forth, I shall place the sorting hat on your head, and you will be sorted into your houses. '

Without

further affair, she held the hat aloft.

'Abbott, Hannah! '

Dazai allowed himself to watch the girl take a seat on the stool, very interested in just what this hat would do. The wrinkled, old hat fell slightly over Hannah 's eyes. He squinted up at the hat, trying to figure out what it might do, only to stare, dumbfounded, as the frayed edges of the pointed hat opened up in a

facsimile

of a mouth.

'HUFFLEPUFF! '

The hat... talked? Dazai felt a grin break out onto his face, finding the useless little things wizards poured their magic into vaguely amusing. He watched with empty humor as student-after-student was sorted into their respective houses, but it wasn 't long until McGonagall was calling,

'Dazai, Osamu! '

There was a momentary pause in applause for the previous student, and Dazai took his cue to step forward. Someone gave him a pat on the back 'Dazai took a guess on it being Ron 'seeming not to care for the flinch that rocked his body in return.

Dazai took a seat in front of the thousand eyes in the room. He felt their attention ten-fold weigh down on him as he rearranged his limbs to rest limply on his lap (

like a doll on display

, he thought unhelpfully). All of the professors were watching him too, which was all the threat Dazai needed to sit

perfectly still.

Ah 'the hat would work on him, right?

Above him, McGonagall held the hat over top his chocolate hair, expression blank and practiced. Belatedly, he thought to shut his eyes 'it wouldn 't do to have the musty hat fall over his eyes like that 'other 'girl.

There was a prolonged moment of silence, followed by the sound of cloth rustling, then:

'SLYTHERIN! '