There are words around you. People. Meanings. Yet you can't extend your mind enough to grasp any of them. Talk passes you by, catty gossip and heated arguments that you struggle to comprehend.

"She hasn't moved in two days."

"They say she's just in shock. Can 't blame her. '

"Open her mouth, I'll pour in some water and medicine."

'Elder, what do you think of the rumours? That she purposefully- '

'The Czar has prohibited this from being discussed. All we 're to do is nurse her the best we can. '

Only mildly interested, you close your ears and go back to your painless slumber. You only register a phrase here and there as time and life pass you by as an endless stream.

"How did this happen?! She was your responsibility, if this gets out, we're at a diplomatic incident! Explain yourself!"

"There was nothing out of the ordinary, I had no reason to assume her guards hated her enough to try and murder her. '

"You miscalculated, Levi! I expect you to take full responsibility for this. You were pulled out from the Wing of Offence to keep this exact thing from happening!"

Why is this person so angry?

You're fine.

You're safe and warm. Existing has never been this easy, as a passive observer. Time floats past you without making an impact of any kind, it feels like years go by as you do nothing but exist while making half-hearted, absent-minded observations about things happening around you.

The sound of worried murmurs, the gentle touch of familiar hands, it all means nothing to you.

"Carry her to the bathtub, Ser. I'll disrobe and wash her as usual."

You distantly feel something warm sprinkled around your body, but it hardly matters.

Your body is secondary, everything around you feels like a hazy dream you doubt you 'll recall later. You feel eyes on you, some benevolent, some malevolent, and you wonder which one of them is your Creator, watching with deep disappointment as you give up and allow yourself to drift away.

Wouldn 't it be easier to just forget everything?

If you go back, you 'll hurt. You 'll remember the things you 're now running from, and it scares you.

You don't know how long you just float by before it even crosses your mind to question anything. But, eventually, you feel a tug of something, a call to regain some resemblance of yourself.

'Oh? Aren 't you a loyal guard dog, standing between your

czarevich

and his pet. '

'I have no intention of allowing you anywhere near her. I have orders- '

'It 's just the orders speaking, huh? Then, why are you glaring at me so fiercely, Levi? There 's nothing to be ashamed of, it wouldn 't be the first time a guard falls for his- '

'You 're imagining things,

your grace

. This is just babysitting duty. '

'You can keep telling yourself that, Levi, if that makes you sleep better at night. I will be back. '

Those voices. Where have you heard them before? And why does one of them persistently make something tug in your chest whenever you hear it in your idle moments?

Little by little, coherence returns.

Where are you?

In Varsiko, a land that 's trying to kill you.

Who are you?

Cora Reader, the 13

th

Princess of the Kingdom of Novaryn.

What are you?

A murderer.

You feel a jolt of pain at the word.

Why

are you?

You don 't know.

But you do know something else, a revelation you accept with bitter feelings. You can 't stay like this forever, can you?

Yet the outside world is scary. Being disconnected from everything. Your family, your culture, your religion, even yourself. In such a short time, you 've gone from a wide-eyed, na 've princess to

this

.

You wonder if your Creator is still looking over you, or if you've already forever lost His favour.

Another jolt of pain.

You killed a man, after all.

At the thought, something stirs in your heart. Guilt?

He attacked me first! I was just defending myself!

you argue fiercely against yourself.

But a human life is a human life. You took it away. You 've crossed a line that can 't be taken back.

You 're a murderer, and you have consequences to bear.

This peace you 've spent what feels like an eternity in is a lie.

With that thought, the glass layer that formed around your psyche as you lay on that unyielding wooden floor, the warm stream of blood serenely flowing all over your white gown, shatters. Formed to protect you from the reality of it all, you willingly tear it down and come back to your senses.

Suddenly, all you can feel is pain. Not the physical kind, that you can bear. It 's the kind that cannot be cured with medicine. Pain that originates from your conscience and heart, radiating all over your body.

Excruciating pain. You can't breathe. You feel as if the large, clammy hands wrap around your throat again.

You're alive, but you're not sure it's worth the price.

Amidst the stampede of your emotions, the unorganised and scary jumble of unintelligible urges and feelings, you don't register you're moving again.

You break out of your catatonic terror just to sit up, bury your nails into your scalp and curl up over your knees.

A scream of anguish tears from your throat as you claw at yourself.

Murderer. Monster. Dead eyes, warm blood, the hard floor. Warm arms, soothing words. The memories flood back and you can 't stop the emotions that come with them.

It takes you long to register you're screaming and even longer that someone is next to you, grabbing your wrists and pulling them away from your head.

'Hey, hey, take it easy, ' you hear a familiar voice grunt, and when you turn your head, the first thing you see is Levi.

Immediately, some of the memories clear up. Hands around your throat, the pain, time slowing down, dead eyes looking into yours and the warmth of blood.

'No ' ' you breathe and try to pull your hands free. Levi doesn 't let you. 'No! '

'Stop struggling and listen to me, ' Levi orders, but you shake your head.

'You '! You! Were you in on this?! Did you order the guard to attack me?! '

'No. '

How could you believe him? You try to rip your wrists away from him, but he holds onto you firmly.

'Let go, ' you command.

'I would, but you 'll just go back to ripping your hair out, ' Levi points out. How can he always be so infuriatingly calm?! Has the augmentation erased his feelings as well?

'Little miss, I get that you 're still in shock, but I 'm going to need you to trust me. '

'Trust you? ' you chuckle humourlessly. 'You are the person in charge of that guard who tried to kill me! You are a Varsikovian. You are not even human! '

Before you notice it, you 're screaming again, tears running down your face.

You can 't trust him. You can trust no one. You 're helpless. You 're alone. And now you 're also a murderer. Maybe you shouldn't have fought after all, if this is the price you pay. Maybe you should have perished.

You struggle with all you 've got even though it 's futile. Levi holds onto your wrists to keep you from hurting yourself until they bruise under his fingers.

He grits his teeth and forcefully drags you in despite your loud screams of protest. You register you 're pressed against something firm. He lets go of your wrists just to wrap his warm arms around you.

You realise you 're pressed against his chest. You feel the steady pulse of his heart, you feel his breath on your hair, and you instinctively stop resisting. Your eyes widen with confusion and relief as you hear his heartbeat against your ear. A reminder of the part of him that 's still human.

'I am not your enemy, little miss, ' he speaks, his voice clear and unwavering yet heart-achingly soft and gentle. 'I only have my word to give but I promise you, if my loyalties ever change against you, I will tell you to your face. I would never go behind your back and engage in something as cowardly as an assassination. '

You slowly relax against him. Something inside you says that you can trust him. You feel safe in his presence.

You 're so tired of fighting this futile battle on your own. You want to let it all go, even if for a minute, and just connect with another human being.

You slump into his chest, your hands clutch the coarse fabric of his cape, and you bury your face into him.

The tears form in your eyes and before you register what you 're doing, you 're bawling your heart out.

He allows you to cry against his sturdy body for what seems like an eternity, holding you through your cries and sobs.

When you pull back, your eyes meet for just a moment. You see the usual stoic look, but underneath is compassion. He feels bad for what happened.

'I owe you an apology, ' he says steadily. You 're just staring at him, mesmerised by the sight of him emoting, even if it 's muffled.

'I was appointed to protect you, yet I failed that order. At the end of the day, it 's on me. I 'm sorry. '

You find yourself shaking your head. You stare deep into the grey and you feel a pull towards him. You want to kiss him. You want him to comfort you in the most intimate of ways.

You move on your own to hug him again, this time tightly. Your face buries into his neck and there 's something pining and intimate in the way you pull him in.

You feel him stiffen, clearly uncomfortable and not knowing how to deal with your need for closeness. He embraced you earlier just to make you listen. Because you needed to feel safe and there was no one else to do it in his stead. This hug, however, feels more personal.

Eventually, he grabs your shoulders and clears his throat. There 's a pensive frown on his face as he pushes you away, gentle but undeniably firm.

'You should reserve such displays of affection for your fianc ' only, ' he says, a little awkward, and gets off the bed. There 's a clear warning in his voice to not get too close. You feel a small pang in your chest and your eyes flicker down to your fisted hands.

You don 't want your fianc '. He doesn 't care.

'Has my fianc ' as much as visited me since I was attacked? '

Levi doesn 't answer and you can decipher the answer from the silence.

'How long was I out? '

'For around eight days. '

'What happened? Tell me everything. '

'The guard died, that much you probably remember. I came in the next morning and found you. The Elder examined you and determined you 're not in danger, just in shock. Your maid and I were, still are, the only ones who agreed to attend to you. '

'Agreed? ' you look confused. Levi sighs, clearly bothered that he must be the one to break the news.

'You 're currently charged with first-degree murder, ' he explains slowly. 'Only me and the Springer maid agreed to guard and tend to you, the rest have declined. '

Immediately, what little comfort you felt from Levi 's embrace vanishes and you feel like you 've been dunked into ice-cold water.

They think you murdered him in cold blood.

'He attacked me, ' you point out helplessly.

'I know. You will probably be cleared of all charges thanks to the bruises around your neck. Despite that, according to our laws, until you 're cleared people are within their rights to refuse to serve you. '

You nod miserably.

'But wait ' Does that mean you have been guarding me non-stop? Around the clock? '

Levi nods nonchalantly as if it 's nothing major.

'What is the Czar doing? '

'His utmost best to keep this from being leaked to Novaryn until he has a convincing case that this was some fringe case and not a Varsikovian conspiracy. '

'Do I need to go on trial? '

'They will probably conduct an internal investigation and declare you innocent. I would be surprised if they convicted you, based alone on the fact that it would start a diplomatic dispute with Novaryn. '

'Is there any insight as for what the guard 's motive was? '

'His autopsy found no sign of alcohol or drugs. He was in full understanding. '

Levi narrows his eyes and leans in.

'If you know anything, now 's the time to come clear, ' he challenges steadily. You falter visibly as you debate with yourself.

You look down at your hands. Your body is recently washed, and your linen is clean.

While everyone else avoided you like the Three Plagues of the Summer of 458, Levi and Maid Springer took care of you when they didn 't need to. Levi swore to you he 'd be honest with his intentions.

Maybe it 's time you start trusting him a little.

You move the covers aside and get on your feet. You 're a bit wobbly, but you still stubbornly make your way to the desk without Levi 's help.

You open the drawer and take out the tall stack of letters.

'Here. Maybe these will give you some clues, ' you mutter and hand Levi the letters.

He takes them with a frown and starts reading through them while you stagger back to your bed. A tense silence falls between you as he reads through every letter without a word, only the sound of rustling parchment filling the room as he sorts through the stack.

'This ' ' he starts and looks at you over the papers. 'How long has this been going on? '

'A month, maybe, ' you shrug.

'And these are the letters you insisted were from your fianc '? '

'Yes. '

Levi sighs deeply and chucks the letters on the desk. He then walks up to you and crosses his arms.

'Why didn 't you tell me? I 'm your guard; if I had known I would have been on much higher alert, ' he scolds you.

'I did not trust you, ' comes your honest reply.

Levi holds his head with a deep sigh.

'Even then, you can 't just ignore a month 's worth of death threats like this. Did you tell anyone? '

You shake your head.

'I would be impressed if it weren 't for the fact that you foolishly put your life in danger by keeping this from me, ' he tells you, deadpan.

'Making a big deal out of it is probably what he wanted, ' you suggest with a stubborn shrug. 'I did not want to give him the satisfaction of knowing he has gotten to me. '

'Well, at least this eliminates the chances that the guard was acting alone, ' Levi assesses. You settle your blankets back on top of yourself and give him a raised eyebrow.

'How so? '

'That guard wouldn 't be able to write something this poetic, ' Levi announces. 'Man was dumb as a rock, which makes me think whoever 's behind these letters easily manipulated him into attacking you in his stead. '

You nod thoughtfully.

'What if it is someone who has more power than I do? ' you ask carefully.

'There is a real chance it might be the

czarevich

, ' Levi reads your thoughts. 'In which case, it 's going to get complicated. We can 't just charge the future Czar with treason. '

You nod. If it ends up being Zeke, you will probably be forced to silence. You can 't openly accuse him without starting an international dispute.

'Levi, ' you start, 'I want an honest answer. If Zeke attacks me, will you be able to step in? '

'I am not able to hurt him seriously. I will try to fend him off, but I can 't kill him or injure him badly. In that case, getting the Czar involved is the best option. '

'You do not think the Czar has any part in this? ' To be honest, neither do you. The Czar has sacrificed a large part of his regime to end the war, it wouldn 't make sense for him to try and kill you now.

'I 'm under strict orders to keep you safe, and he visited you to yell at me while you were out, ' Levi informs you. 'He 's potentially the person who 's freaking out about this the most. '

You nod. For now, the Czar seems to be on your side. But if he has to pick between his son and you, you have an eerie premonition about how that would end up. Czar Yeager, unlike your father, seems to genuinely love his children.

'Either way, you have been out for eight days. Before we come up with a plan, you need to eat. '

'Plan? '

'I want to get to the bottom of these letters and find out who sent them and why. Rather than just waiting for the next attempt. '

If it 's Zeke, there 's not a lot you can do aside from asking the Czar for help. Nonetheless, you say nothing as Levi calls for Maid Springer.

She comes in a dozen minutes later with a meal. You give Levi a confused look.

'Am I not allowed out? '

'You 're in room arrest until you 're cleared of the charges, ' Levi explains. Figures.

'You poor dear, ' Maid Springer sighs as she sets the tray of warm fish soup and bread on your lap. 'Eat up. '

'Do you believe I 'm innocent? ' you ask her, taken aback. She pauses and gives you a stern, weirded-out look.

'What do you mean

do I believe

? Anyone who 's met you once knows you couldn 't kill anyone without a heavy reason, your grace. Would a murderer share her food with a commoner like my son? I don 't think so, ' she squawks passionately.

You 're not sure the logic holds up, but you appreciate the sentiment.

Under the hawk-like gazes of both Levi and Maid Springer, you finish the whole meal, not because you 're hungry but because you know your two minders will start fussing in unison if you don 't.

You allow Levi to carry you to the bathroom since your legs are still wobbly, but insist that he and Maid Springer wait outside while you bathe in peace.

As you slip out of your robes and into the warm water, you let out a long sigh. You 're still struggling to come in terms with the whole situation.

You survived. Now what? The situation hasn 't changed. You 're still a target, people don 't trust you. They even think you killed the guard for fun.

You cup your hands and gather some warm water in them to look at your reflection. You look afraid and insecure, deeply disturbed.

Should you send Sirius a letter and tell him everything that happened, he would without a doubt start campaigning relentlessly for the annulment of the engagement. This, however, would come at the cost of the peace negotiations.

You know your life isn 't worth that much. Na 've as you may be, you know how little you matter in the grand scheme of things. Should you die, there are 12 other princesses who can serve exactly the same purpose.

You start scrubbing your hair clean, deep in thought. You feel the temptation to slip back into the dark place you just pulled yourself out of, the idle state of merely existing without a coherent thought. Without self-awareness, just a consciousness lost in space and time.

It would be easier, yet do you truly wish to waste your life on such goalless things?

But what do you have here? The whole nation is against you.

Not the whole nation,

a sudden thought crystallises. You have an ally. Levi is on your side.

So is Maid Springer, even Historia. You have people who sympathise with you, who are willing to help you.

Do you truly wish to disregard that and selfishly cease to function? Do you truly wish to embrace the notion of being a useless puppet with both arms open?

You suddenly recall Levi 's words from that small, blossoming hill you sat on together. How he thinks you have what it takes. All you need is information and experience.

As you slather your body with sweet-smelling soap, you grit your teeth together. You dig up that small and bruised seed of determination just to plant it back in your mind, where it was unrooted with the shock of the murder attempt.

You 're not just some useless princess. You refuse to give up and let everyone else handle things for you. You may be na 've, but you 're not defeated this easily.

You refuse. You have your pride.

You need to keep fighting.

With that thought, you get out of the bathtub and wrap a warm towel around yourself. You call for Levi to step outside while you 're indecent and then allow Maid Springer to pull a proper dress on you.

As she cinches your waist and waves your hair, you meet your eyes in the mirror. They 're no longer scared and disturbed. You 've found a footing, albeit a shaky one.

You will rely on the small amount of confidence and determination you 've managed to muster. The rest, you can feign. If you 're good at one thing, it 's keeping your wounds hidden until you 're out of sight.

It 's time to soldier on.

It 's a resolve you intend to hold onto, even if you know it 's still weak enough to be shattered with one blow.

But it 's all you 've got right now, your fragile resolve and a handful of allies. The cards you have been dealt and all you can do is play them smart.

Levi comes back in a few minutes later with the word that the Czar wishes to meet with you.

You nod at him and dismiss Maid Springer.

When Czar Yeager walks in, the first thing you notice is the huge circles under his eyes. His face is sunken from the lack of sleep and his lips are dry and cracked. When he looks at you, his eyes momentarily flickering to the marks around your neck, he looks pained.

'Before we start discussing this incident, there is something I must do, ' he tells you as he closes the door after himself, his voice solemn and his posture stiff.

Then, quite suddenly, he falls to his knees and presses his forehead against the floor, bowing to you in a deeply regretful gesture.

'I have no excuses for what happened to you. Clearly, we didn 't protect you enough and for that, I am deeply sorry. I hope you can forgive me for the way my country has treated you. '

You and Levi gape at him for a few seconds. You exchange bewildered looks with him and then hurry to kneel in front of him.

'Please stand up, your grace, ' you beg. 'You are not responsible for this attempt. You should not bow down to anyone. '

The Czar shakes his head stubbornly. He stays down for a few seconds more and then sits up.

'Allowing this to happen was most shameful, ' he says, and for a second his eyes turn to Levi with an accusing edge. 'Once the charges are cleared, I will personally make sure your guards are extensively screened for anti-Novarynian sentiments. '

You nod and give him your trained smile.

'Thank you, your grace. There is no need to stress, I 'm fine. I did not get seriously hurt. '

'Only because you felt unsafe enough to carry a knife with you, ' Czar Yeager reminds you gravely. 'I 've ordered Levi to stay with you at all times until we 've finished the investigation of this incident, even if the other guards volunteer to return to duty. '

You glance at Levi, your heart taking a leap in your chest at the mention. That means he 's going to guard you during the nights as well.

He gets on his feet and you follow suit.

'As of now, all the evidence points towards the perpetrator acting alone, ' the Czar tells you earnestly. You glance at your desk where the letters are stored but don 't tell him about them. The Czar is without a doubt eager to rule this a singular incident, who knows what he 'd do with evidence on the contrary. Let alone if the perpetrator ends up being his own son.

Instead, you nod and smile emptily.

'That is a relief, your grace. '

'I will, unfortunately, have to comply with the protocol when it comes to your charges. Until they 're cleared, you have to stay in this room. I 'll tell Eren to visit you, ' he promises.

'I 'm sure his grace has better things to do, there is no need to bother him with this, ' you offer an empty pleasantry.

'Nonsense. He 's your fianc ' and the fact that he hasn 't visited you yet is outrageous, ' Czar Yeager huffs.

You wince a little, you can see your relations getting tenser if the Czar once again forces his hand.

'I would prefer to summon him myself, your grace, it would feel more personal that way, ' you quickly suggest.

The Czar contemplates for a moment and finally nods. He places a warm hand on your shoulder.

'Alright. I appreciate that you try to connect with him. He 's a good kid, just very stubborn and hot-headed. He 'll come around eventually, ' he promises.

You nod. Not that you believe Eren will ever come to like you, but you always make sure to be polite around the Czar.

A silence falls between you, during which an awkward frown creeps on Czar Yeager 's face. It 's obvious he wants to ask something of you.

'Cora, listen, ' he starts with a clear of this throat. 'About, erm, disclosing details of this incident, I know it 's a lot to ask of you but I would very much appreciate it if you ' Chose

carefully

whom to confide in, ' he states slowly, picking each word carefully.

You catch on immediately.

'I do not plan to tell my brother or mother about this, ' you promise. 'I wish not to worry them, and as you said, this likely a singular incident. '

A lie, of course, you know there 's a wider conspiracy behind it, but you don 't want to escalate things. Your brother would without a doubt voice his discontent for allowing you to get hurt and things could spiral out of control from there.

It 's for the best if they never find out.

Czar Yeager looks relieved. He smiles at you meekly.

'A respectable princess they sent us. You have my gratitude, ' he tells you gently. 'In return for your trust, I promise to never let anything like this happen again. '

An empty promise, but you appreciate the sentiment.

You nod again, and the Czar turns for the door.

'I 'll do my utmost best to hasten the investigation and get your charges cleared. Until then, please rest and should you need anything, you can turn to Levi. '

'I shall. Thank you, your grace. '

Czar Yeager walks to the door. As he opens it, he turns to look at Levi over his shoulder.

'Keep her safe, no matter the cost. That 's an order. '

'Understood, ' Levi responds immediately, eyes hard and unreadable. When the Czar 's gone, you let out a long breath.

'Do not tell him about the letters. I cannot count on the Czar having my back if our suspicions turn out to be right and the czarevich is behind them. '

'Got it, ' Levi nods.

The rest of the day goes by uneventfully. You obediently eat every meal Maid Springer gives you, the Elder of the castle does a check-up and deems you physically sound, just suffering from mental trauma.

You decide to start thinking of a plan the next day with Levi, once you 've rested for a night and your brain is clearer.

As the day turns into evening, you visit the balcony to murmur a small prayer and then retire to your bed.

You dive under the covers and glance at Levi, who 's still standing by the doors with an unreadable expression. His eyes look even darker and stormier than usual in the dim light.

'Are you not going to rest? '

'I can sleep while standing. One of the abilities being augmented gives you, ' he explains nonchalantly.

Blinking, you try to imagine Levi asleep. It 's harder than it has any right to be.

'Can you sleep with your eyes open as well? '

'Don 't be dumb, of course not, ' he snorts.

You turn your back and curl up under the blankets. You left the lantern on your desk on so Levi doesn 't have to stand in the darkness all night.

You 're hyper-aware of his presence. Usually, he retires to his quarters for the night and another soldier stands guard outside your chambers.

You squeeze your eyes shut and try to calm your thundering heart. Whatever it is that 's causing this new and unsettling feeling, it needs to stop.

It 's not good to harbour feelings for a man like Levi. A Varsikovian war hero who 's irredeemably tarnished with the Black Science of Alchemy, and has spent his whole life slaughtering your kind.

Not that your heart listens to you. Not even with the reminder that Levi will turn on you should the war ever re-ignite and he gets the order to eliminate you.

The small slivers of compassion, the care and worry he extends to you, the small human things he displays at times when he forgets to act the part of a soldier who knows no emotion, they draw you in.

Safe arms around you. A fleeting warmth on your forehead.

'It 's okay, little miss. I've got you. '

Your eyes snap open. Those words. Where did you hear them before?

Your memories are all jumbled up. You can 't place those images anywhere. Are they make-believe?

Pushing the memories away, you instead focus on resting.

It takes you forever to fall asleep, and when you do, you hardly slumber for an hour before the memories start replaying in your dreams.

Large hands on your throat. The sickening, ripping sound of your hair being pulled out of your scalp. The inhumane gargling sound of a man, desperately trying to draw a breath when his lungs are filling with the warmth of his own blood.

The ceiling you stared at for hours to come.

In your sleep, you curl up and whimper. Once, then again and again until you 're effectively sobbing. Levi watches without a move at first, but like a moth to a flame, he can 't run from his heart 's demise.

He walks to you in silence. Sitting down on the edge of your bed, he places his hand on your hair and caresses it tenderly.

Instinctively, you move your head towards the touch.

'Sleep, little miss. I will not allow anything to harm you, ' he soothes with a quiet, pining voice. Instantly, your sobs get just a little less anguished.

Levi strokes your hair and watches over you for what feels like hours until your whimpers die down and you 're peaceful again, curled up with your chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm.

He allows himself a brief moment of adoring your sleeping face before removing his hand from what wasn 't his to touch, to begin with. He returns to his post at the door, once again sealing his affections deep inside the vault of his heart.

Come morning, his loving touch and soft words will be but a vanished memory.

-

The day starts with Maid Springer barging in with breakfast. She watches like a hawk as you eat and then ushers you out of bed to get you ready. You 're not going to leave your room and thus, getting presentable is not important, but Maid Springer seems to be in the camp that believes in the healing power of routines.

Admittedly, you feel better once you 're out of bed, bathed, fed and dressed.

You don 't know if Levi slept at all last night but if he didn 't, he doesn 't show it on his face. He looks just as alert as usual.

Once you 're ready, Maid Springer makes for the door, and when she opens it, she bumps into someone who was just about to enter. She looks up, and when she sees who it is, she scrambles to curtsey.

'Your grace! Please, excuse me, ' she gasps and hurries off. The person she bumped into says nothing and instead, walks right into your room without as much as requesting permission.

Your whole body immediately goes on full alert. You see his gleeful eyes behind the round glasses, his fair beard and moustache, the smirk on his face, and instinctively take a step back from where you were standing by the vanity.

'This was left outside, ' Zeke tells you and shows you an envelope. Immediately, you can tell from the handwriting that it 's from your murderous friend.

It 's as if he 's not even trying to hide it.

'Your grace, ' you greet stiffly and curtsey.

'I was most shocked when I heard about what happened, ' he hums non-convincingly. From the corner of your eye, you see Levi move a bit closer and subtly place his hand on the handle of his rifle.

Zeke 's left his guard outside. Either he 's not here to start trouble or he 's convinced Levi will not defy him.

Despite your pulse suddenly ringing in your ears, you meet Zeke 's eyes steadily.

He gives you a slow and intrusive once-over, his eyes pausing on your neck and gaining an unnerving hue of fondness.

You take the letter from him when he hands it to you. You 're not going to read it in front of him, something tells you that 's what he wants.

'Have you told your family? ' he asks harmlessly. You shake your head.

'Czar Yeager has asked me not to until they can figure out whether there is a larger conspiracy at play, ' you answer. You mention nothing of the letters.

'And you just listen to him? ' he mocks. 'Well, not that I can blame a lapdog for not knowing to do anything besides trying to please its master. '

The dreams you 've had, where Zeke has forcefully pushed you down and taken your honour, invade your thoughts, but you fight off the instinct to back down. Levi 's here, he 'll make sure nothing bad happens.

'Nothing good will come out of getting Novaryn involved now, ' you counter bravely.

'Is that so? ' something flashes in Zeke 's eyes. He steps closer, and you force yourself to stay rooted. You will not let him notice how nervous you are.

'So, you 're trying to think with your own brain instead of blindly relying on the Czar, is that how it is? ' he asks with a hum. You meet his eyes as he walks closer until he 's right in front of you.

You say nothing. He extends a hand and easily slips it into your hair.

'How amusing, ' he chuckles. 'And if you catch the person who orchestrated the murder attempt, what would you say to him? ' he asks silkily.

'I would tell him that there are better ways to avenge for his mother 's disappearance, ' you tell him on a whim, just to see his reaction. Zeke pauses and then chuckles. His eyes gain an ominous sheen.

'Blaming me, are we? I had no part in the attempt on your life, ' he replies. He places his other hand on your neck, and that unnerving lust is back on his features.

'They look gorgeous on you, ' he remarks. 'The bruises. '

You feel a shudder go through your body, and you see Levi step closer.

'Release me, ' you demand, but Zeke leans in instead. You feel his breath against your throat as he latches his lips on the largest bruise and starts suckling on the sore skin.

You see Levi draw out his sword from the corner of your eye, and suddenly you fear for him. What if he gets in trouble by stepping in?

Thus, you defend yourself. You shove Zeke away and send your hand flying, slapping him right across the face.

'Do not take me for some common courtesan, your grace, ' you tell him, your hand closed over the kiss mark he just made. 'I am loyal to my fianc '. If you do not want this to become a matter between yourself, him and the Czar, you shall never lay your hands on me again. '

Zeke touches his stinging cheek. He licks his lips, eyes clearly intrigued, and he laughs just a little.

'A pet dog that bites back, how amusing. ' His eyes slide to Levi, who 's drawn his sword and is glaring openly, eyes stormy and dangerous.

'Seems like you 're already betraying your fianc '. In your fantasies, at least, ' Zeke assesses when he sees the way your eyes involuntarily flicker to Levi. 'I would be careful if I were you. He 's nothing but a guard dog, and you 're not the master he 's loyal to. '

You narrow your eyes.

'Whatever do you mean? '

Zeke chuckles and catches your chin between his fingers.

'Oh, don 't tell me he hasn 't told you, ' he says gleefully. 'Why, isn 't this amusing? '

Levi 's eyes turn harder.

'I believe the little miss asked you to not touch her, ' he interjects tensely. Zeke chuckles and lets go.

'Yes, yes. As protective as always, eh, Levi? Sorry for touching your precious princess, ' he drawls and walks to the door. He pauses just as he 's about to step out and glances at you over his shoulder.

'Sooner or later, pet, I can call you mine. '

Your eyes harden.

'What do you want from me? ' you ask, dropping the proper act for a moment.

As if to respect you showing your true face, he does the same and his face turns ruthless and dangerous.

'I 'm sure you 've got it figured out, more or less, ' he replies, his smile gone. 'And if you know what 's good for you, you won 't rise against me, pet. Good day. '

The door closes after him, and you 're left in a heavy silence. Levi looks annoyed and he hurries to check on your neck.

'What did he mean when he talked about you? ' you ask Levi as he grabs your chin to tilt your head to the side so he can get a good look. He shakes his head.

'It 's nothing important. '

You don 't believe him.

'Levi, I need to trust you for this to work, and I cannot do that if you hide important things from me, ' you beg.

He grits his teeth and lets go of you when he deems you unharmed.

'I can 't tell you. '

'You mean, you do not want to, ' you shoot back.

Levi is conflicted. He looks at you and opens his mouth, jaws clenched together as if the gesture alone takes a lot of his strength.

He takes a deep breath to speak, but instead of words, what comes out is a strangled noise and a gag. He quickly covers his mouth to keep himself from retching. For the first time ever, you see anything resembling helplessness in his eyes as he looks at you.

'I can 't tell you, ' he breathes.

'What do you mean? ' you ask, worried because he 's pale and looks ill all of a sudden. You walk to him and place a gentle hand on his shoulder. 'Are you alright? Do you want me to fetch the Elder? '

Levi shakes his head.

'I 'll be fine in a couple of minutes. '

You watch him take deep breaths, eyes closed and focused. Slowly, his paleness fades and he looks normal again.

'What was that? '

'I can 't tell you, ' Levi explains tensely. He opens his eyes to meet yours. 'There are reasons. But what I will promise is this; I am loyal to you now. Should that ever change, I will tell you. '

You 're confused. You have no idea what Levi just went through, why he looked sick, but your only chance as of now is to place some trust in him. You can 't get to the bottom of the letters on your own.

So, you nod.

'Alright. I shall trust you. For now, at least. '

Levi nods and plops a gentle hand on your head for just a second before turning his attention to the letter Zeke handed you.

'Going to open it? '

Only now remembering it even existed, you hurry to tear your eyes, dreamy thanks to the gesture, away from Levi and to the letter. You tear it open and take out a paper, the scribblings on it written with familiar cursive. Levi moves next to you to look over the contents as well.

I should have known better than tasking that buffoon with killing you. Well done surviving what should 've been your end.

But worry not. I will get you eventually. Seeing how you handled that swine of a guard, it makes me all the more eager to be the one to sink my blade into your bruised, delicate neck, the colour draining from your face along with the blood-

You feel a chunk of your resolve being chipped away. Your only recently found mental stability is already swaying with the sadistic words. Despite that, you can 't tear your eyes away from the letter.

Just as you 're about to read the whole fantasy, Levi, having already skimmed his gaze over the rest of it, unceremoniously takes the letter from you and tears it to pieces.

'You don 't have to read some sick bastard 's sadistic fantasies, ' he tells you as you stare at him, at a loss for words.

He rips the paper a few more times than necessary to drive his point home, a clearly disgusted look on his face.

Your eyes glisten with gratitude and you feel a strong desire to hug him again. Instead, you merely nod and relish in the dissatisfied huff he makes as he throws the pieces in the bin.

You 're not alone, you again remind your fragile psyche. You have someone to help you stand. An ally, a haven, even if only for a moment.